If you can, would you?

Theirs is a life where an old, dirty ball kissing the dust is their only source of joy, where memories of their loved ones are their only possession, where their only hope is to have a food to be shared and wake up the next morning with body parts intact if not burned to death. This is the everyday reality of the children in South Sudan trapped in a war that gives meaning to Sam Childers’ life. His humanity made me watch the movie “Machine Gun Preacher” till the end. It makes me dwell on the question if I could, would I? 

If you found meaning for knowing God, I would not deny you of your ecstasy in this endeavor and you will fins Sam's story palatable.


Attending the ministry gave him the strength to realize a change in his life that led him to become a preacher. Seeing the suffering and the unspoken pain of the children humanizes him again and again. It made him angry to his business partner who wastes money to host a lavish party to those who have much in their lives to show off rather than share to the least fortunate. It made him opted to use gun to protect the children. It made him doubt his faith and question the power of his god to end the evil. His concern to the children’s pain and suffering abducted him from his ministry and family. And he kills people (well, at least not in the name of god) to keep those children alive. If you  could  bring the children home by any means, would you? It is the challenge he posted at the end of the film. Being with those children in Sudan till today is his reply to this question.

If you could , would you?  It is the moral question I would like to resolve more than finding meaning in super natural.  Being a believer of self-respect and self-empowerment, I give a damn to those who cannot take control of their lives. Take for instance, one gets addicted because of the weakness to control one’s knowledge, decision and action. I watch the film to make sense of the story (also because of Gerard Butler and the Ugly Truth) and not because it is a story of a preacher who kills or a story of a criminal who became a preacher. I am strong enough not to be controlled by my knowledge that religion is a selfish concept because you are motivated to do good for the rewards like salvation and place to heaven and not for good sake. I am strong enough not to be dictated by the popular opinion for fear to stand alone while others are on their knees begging for supernatural attention.  I am strong enough to write about things that might be offensive to those whose concern is their place to heaven and status quo, thus endangering lost of audience. Nevertheless, my continued word emission proves my confidence is getting stronger.

As much as I  can  ignore the movie because it depicts the power of supernatural in a person's life, I would not because I am more concern on praising the sense of responsibility and human's power to get things done. The following is an interesting flowchart that a free mind will be interested to look into:

If I could, would I? I would make sense of the emotional effect in the circumstance if I am rational. I would be peaceful if I am just. I would be happy if it comes from within. I would be good if I can see evil in disguise. Evil triumphs because good would not stand for goodness’ sake.  I would start by being moral and ethical. I will leave the religion of fear behind and look forward to the bravery of humanism.